Social Butterfly

Last Wednesday, we went for our nightly ride to explore our new community. We were listening to my last tattoo's playlist; I was singing along with She Said then the music and the energy dropped - I felt like someone left the universe. I never felt that before - - - it felt like a new emptiness. I didn't know why until the next afternoon. Thursday afternoon, I found out that someone I knew who also had Fibromyalgia and mental health issues passed away. I didn't know her very well, she was someone I followed on social media; she would advocated for herself, her struggle with chronic illness and mental illness. I thought of her often. When I was moving away, I thought of gifting her my chronic illness books before I left. I debated the idea for a few days, and I decided that it would be best if I kept my books to myself. I remember someone offered some suggestions to her and she became furious with them, I didn't want to upset or anger her. I'm quite sad and heartbroken that she has left this world... I related to her so so much, maybe in another universe we could have been besties. I thought she was strong and brave. I admired her voice and the noise she made about how the health care system was letting people down. I feel like I am being more vocal because women like her --- it's so incredibly important to keep being loud and get more support for our mental health.

August 23, 2022

The universe did send me a sign months ago, on the day her obituary was published I saw a cardinal which is a symbol of an angel with a divine message; a message of inspiring change and transformation. I didn't feel it at the time, and I was unaware of the symbolism the cardinal carries, I remember feeling lucky to watch them so closely for the first time in my life.