graduation dress

Last April, I found this pretty, soft pink Smart Set dress on poshmark and thought it would be great for my graduation ceremony. The day it was delivered, I received an email from the college at the very end of the work day, therefore I was unable to call or reach someone from the office to discuss the matter. I was placed on academic probation due to my low grades in my final semester. Because the email was vague and I immediately think of the worse case scenario, I thought it affected my finals and thought it meant I would not be graduating. I tried reaching out to my program advisor but she was "ignoring me" and I would not get answers from the academic office, they kept telling me they didn't know if it affects my standing and if I would or would not be graduating in a month's time.
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tweeted on May 4, 2022.

I was heartbroken. I was telling myself that I would have gotten mental health help sooner had I known I was failing, not graduating, wasting my time and hurting myself with learning about my traumas. After a week of no answers, I heard back from my professor, she knew I passed but did not know why I was sent such an email. The professor did not ignore me, she was away for a post semester holiday (much deserved as well). The matter was not solved until May 12th. By then I was done. I had given up on almost everything. Just days after my ceremony, I was readmitted to the hospital.
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On graduation day, there was two ceremonies. The morning ceremony was with my friends/my family from IWAP. The evening ceremony was solo for my office administration program. I did not wear the pretty, soft pink Smart Set dress that I was looking forward to wearing at such a wonderful occasion. I wore a black dress for the morning and a black jumpsuit for the evening. Almost like I dressed for CeCe's funeral. 
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The dress is now very special date night dress.
Kirk took me to a café where we saw the Northern Pikes play in 2017; we had miss the kitchen hours that night but still enjoyed our specialty coffees. He had promised that he'd bring me back for a bite to eat. Last summer, we had one of their pizzas and I had a raspberry lemonade. Last night, Kirk wanted to take me out for pasta and lemonade to celebrate his new employment.

July 9, 2022

April 12, 2023