Of three children, my birthday is third. My little brother's birthday is in February. My older sister's birthday is early March and my birthday is at the end of March. Some years, I watched both of them get birthday parties and special things. Even as adults, when my sister was about to celebrate a milestone birthday, there was a big deal from relatives but my milestone birthdays were ignored 20 days after her milestone birthdays. We're 5 years apart. There was a big deal at 25, 30, 35...  I didn't even get a call - but they would call to get my sister's information from me. It's fucking insulting how obvious LM household (and their families) treated me.

My LM parental units told me when I was turning ten years old that if I wanted a birthday party, I had to plan it myself, well I did and barely any guests came and my parents had to shop of the morning of the party since they did not specify that share my plans. The reason why they did buy party supplies was because I had invited a LM co-worker's child and they wouldn't want to look like they didn't help plan this party - that child didn't come to the party either. I was in trouble after my guest went home. From then on, I never asked for much or anything at all because I would be shutdown and put down quickly.

​I didn't get a sweet sixteen party and just before my seventeenth birthday, I told my OM parental unit that I wanted a party. She invited my best friend over on the weekend before my birthday date to celebrate my seventeenth and told Darcy to bring the new friends we had made a few weekends ago, Austin and Cody.

​My OM parent bought me a piñata. It was set up in the backroom because it was built like a workshop and there was no carpets, it would be easy to sweep up after we broke the piñata open. We each took a turn to try to break it open, then on Austin's second turn, he became violent and raged, he destroyed the piñata but this was not the fun experience I had wished for - - - I loved seeing the people who get a piñata when it's a game and fun but this was scary. Very scary.

Shortly after we gathered what we could find of the candy on the floor, my OM parental unit and her partner went upstairs, the boys and I wanted to go outside for a smoke, Darcy decided she was going to stay in the living room. I went alone with the boys to the greenhouse. My OM parental units retreated to the upstairs (I don't know if they were in the room above the greenhouse or in the front room on the other side of the house).  Austin still had that energy from destroying the piñata and he announced that it was necessary to gift me with birthday patty whacks (with the same angry energy on the piñata), I said don't before he grabbed me, he held me close with one arm and repeatedly whacked me with his free hand, he encouraged Cody to hit me. I was helpless and terrified, the way Cody was looking at me, I felt he was victimized as well.  I don't remember if Cody had his hands on me, Austin was so chaotic and I just see Cody's smug smirk.

Yes, this is the same Cody that I went on to be his girlfriend for eleven months starting that September when I transferred schools. I thought he was a victim too and I tried to protect and encourage him, I guess the way he could have protected me and encouraged me but he never did. He was miserable and mean to me the whole time. Our first kiss could have been so sweet & gentle but he grabbed my face & licked me, and said "how do you like it?" I survived another 330 days of being his girlfriend.

On my eighteenth birthday, Cody came over for cake and a quick visit. During that visit, we went to the backroom for a cigarette. He made comments on how Austin destroyed the piñata, then he destroyed me. I saw that smirk again, the one I misread as sympathetic was laughing at me and what happened here the year before.